Musings

As Leliana strolled back through town, Alistair, Tessa and Morrigan discussed the matter from their vantage point on the cliffs above.

“I don’t sense any darkspawn. Nothing at all” Tessa thought aloud

“Neither do I, maybe Leliana learned something” Alistair replied.

“I sense magic, powerful magic, the kind demons possess.” Was Morrigan’s observance.

Leliana approached then, and delivered her news.

The town was coming under siege nightly. Undead poured from the castle every night and attacked the village according to the village mayor. There have been no darkspawn in the area, and no activity from the castle in days. Noone knew if Arl Eamon still lived either. Tessa chewed on her bottom lip in thought.

“If Morrigan is right, and this is a magic problem, or even a demon…we aren’t equipped to handle it. Morrigan’s spells are powerful, enough so that we could help with the coming attack. But to get to the root of the problem, perhaps we should visit the circle? We have a treaty for them after all. Two birds with one stone? It’s up to you Alistair, he’s your friend.”

“The circle tower is only a day’s travel. If we’re going to help Arl Eamon, I would prefer we have as much help as we can get. Let’s get back to camp so Leliana can change” He said.

“Great! Let’s take the apostate right to the mage’s self inflicted prison, full of templars. Brilliant!” Morrigan interjected.

Tessa hadn’t thought about that, but quickly reassured her that it would be fine.

“As Duncan explained it to me, apostates are not exactly off limits to our ranks. You are safe with us.”

“Tessa is right, and if all else fails, I can tie you up and play the Templar that caught the sneaky witch thief” Joked Alistair.

“Or she can wear Leliana’s chantry robe…” added Tessa

In a bit of a huff Morrigan finally relented saying “if you two are quite through making terrible jokes, let us be off then”

When they arrived back at camp, Morrigan went to gather a few extra things for the journey, and Leliana went to change. Thus leaving Tessa and Alistair alone at the fire.

“Alistair?…why didn’t you tell me about your birthright? Did you not trust me?” She asked, not looking at him.

He reached out to her, gently taking her chin in his hand, tilting her head to meet his eyes.

“No, it’s not that I didn’t trust you. I do. Completely. It’s just that everyone who’s ever found out treats me differently. I stop being Alistair, and become ‘the bastard prince’. I wanted you to like me…for me. I’m sorry.”

For a moment, Tessa couldn’t quite breathe. She knew she needed to say something, but all she could focus on were his eyes. What color was that anyhow? Sometimes brownish, sometimes, in the right light, hinting at green. And warm, they were so warm, and kind, and gentle, and inviting.  Get your mind in order woman, he’s waiting for a response here!

“I understand, no harm done Alistair. And…” She paused only for a moment before continuing “I do like you, for you.”

With a wicked grin she added “Though you being a prince…I find that rather thrilling” with a slightly seductive tone.

“Oh! Did I just find the one damned good thing about my birthright? I think I did!”  Then he chuckled and suggested they get going.

Tessa gathered her pack, smiling to herself, as Leliana joined her.

“So, he’s Maric’s son? “ She asked.

“Apparently, but to me…he’s just Alistair” Tessa replied.

“Oh, I don’t think he’s just anything to you” Leliana chuckled as they headed back to the road.

“Son of a motherless three legged GOAT!” Came from the direction of Tessa’s  tent this morning. Along with much rustling, clanking, and more cursing. Thinking something evil had slipped in without being seen, Alistair grabbed his sword and ripped open the flap, to save his fellow Warden.

“What is it?!” he asked, ready to defend her against the offending monster,  too late realizing she was…Oh maker she was nearly naked.

Tessa rushed to cover herself with something, as Alistair turned bright red,left the tent, and…was she laughing at him?

“I fail to see just what is so blasted funny”  he groused as she came out of her tent, fastening the last buckle on her leather armor…which he realized then fit her so well, it didn’t really leave anything to the imagination, and he blushed even more.Yes, yes she was laughing. Curse her.

“You let out a string of curses that would make the arch demon blush, and I try to defend you, and you laugh at me? really?” he huffed.

“I doubt you can defend me from this thunderhumping headache. Unless you plan to slam your shield into me the next time I reach for a wine bottle.”

It was his turn to laugh.

“Oh maker, for a lady of noble birth you DO have quite the mouth don’t you? I bet your mother is…” he stopped, mentally kicking himself. Oh how sensitive.

To his surprise, she actually laughed and said “proud of me? Well, she’d washed my mouth with lye soap rather often, but finding that solution never really worked, I fear she had given up. I rather think she was relieved to have an excuse as to why I was not yet married off”

“So you used your mouth to scare away suitors, I should think your daggers were sufficient” he joked

“A sharp wit my friend, is as valuable a weapon as a sharp blade.” She shot back as Sten strode over to the fire and shocked them all by saying that perhaps Alistair was less well armed, as he handed her a skin of water, treated with something bitter.

“What’s this Sten?” Tessa inquired

“It is water.”

Oh, this again. Sten was hardly known for his explanations.

“What’s IN the water Sten”

“Herbs”

Tessa sighed.

“For what purpose?”

“Women who try to be men and drink as if it were so.”

Well he had her there, she thought as she drank the water. The throbbing in her head subsided within minutes. The rest of the camp was stirring, It was time to decide what to do. Redcliffe should probably be their first stop. They needed to see what was going on with Arl Eamon’s illness. When Tessa mentioned this, she noticed Alistair looked a bit uncomfortable, but she assumed he was still flustered at what he saw in her tent.

The plan was, to have Leliana dressed in her chantry robe, enter the village and see what she could find out. Morrigan, Tessa, and Alistair would watch from a vantage point in case she was attacked on the road, and Shadow would accompany her as an extra measure of security. Sten, who as of yet had no armor to speak of, would remain and keep watch over the camp. Once everyone was ready, they set out.

The road was quiet, Morrigan was out ahead of them, Leliana was throwing a stick for Shadow as they walked, leaving Alistair and Tessa in the rear. Tessa, tired of all the quiet, spoke to Alistair.

“So you said this Arl Eamon raised you?”

“Oh did I? Actually, I was raised by dogs. Big dogs, flying dogs, from the Anderfels” He quipped.

“Oh Really” said Tessa

“Or did I dream that? It’s funny what dreams you’ll have when sleeping on the cold ground isn’t it? Are you having any strange dreams?”

Tessa thought for just a moment before the temptation to make him blush won out.

“Only the ones where we’re making made love in my tent” she whispered in his ear, leaving Alistair with his jaw open, and his ears an interesting shade of red.

Leliana looked at her, then back at Alistair, and chuckled.

“What did you say to poor Alistair now?”

Tessa replied “Oh nothing, he was doing his best to deflect questions with humor…I simply gave him something to think about”

Leliana giggled again “You’re a wicked woman Tessa…purely wicked”

Tessa just smiled, and enjoyed the thought for a moment.

Alistair finally having gotten a grip on his blushing answered the question. Explaining that his mother was a serving girl in Redcliffe castle, who’d died in while he was quite young. His father was unknown, branding him a bastard. All was well until the Arl got married, and his new Orlesian wife didn’t like the rumors that Alistair was the Arl’s bastard child. This, led to Alistair being sent to the Chantry at the age of 10, and made to become a templar. Tessa, after hearing this and watching the pain it caused him, had an immediate dislike for the Arlessa.

They were just outside of Redcliffe now, Leliana was on her way with Shadow at her side. Morrigan was watching over the hill, and Alistair walked up and pulled Tessa to the side.

“Can I talk to you a moment?” he asked, shifting awkwardly.

I have…something else I need to tell you. I should have told you earlier, but…”

She had a feeling this wasn’t going to be good.

“I told you the Arl raised me, before sending me to the Chantry. What I didn’t tell you was why. My father was…King Maric”

Tessa wasn’t exactly shocked at this bit of information. She’d had an inkling there was an underlying cause for an Arl to take in an orphaned child, rather than send him straight to the chantry, or an orphanage.

“So” she said “You’re not just a bastard, you’re a royal bastard” with a grin.

Alistair looked relieved, and decided he’d have to use that line more often. He also apologized for hiding it from her, which she shrugged off.

“Anything else I should know about?” she asked

“Besides my unholy love of fine cheeses and a minor obsession with my hair? No. Now can we just get back to me being some nobody that was too lucky to die on that tower?” He quipped.

“Well, what does that make me?” Tessa inquired.

As he walked away he looked over his shoulder and said “The reason I think we have a chance”

“Have I told you I like the way you wear your hair?” Leliana asked as Teressa walked over to her.

“Uhh thanks, that’s kind of what I want to talk to you about. I need to change it. I need to change…everything” Came the reply.

“I’m listening” Leliana said, motioning for her to sit.

“You saw the bounty note, with my image. I need to not look like that anymore.” She started, while motioning for Morrigan to join them.

When Morrigan took a seat with them, she explained everything that had led to this point. Who she was, How she had become a Warden, all of it. Including how, that brought extra risk upon them all.  Neither looked surprised, especially Morrigan who was chuckling

“It wasn’t hard to see your nobility my friend. It oozes from you in your speech, and in your movement.” She said, “What WILL be hard, is stopping that. But we shall try. Let me gather some things, I shall return” she finished, heading towards her shelter on the edge of camp.

Leliana chimed in “Your hair…we can change that. You have a comb and brush yes? Take those braided coils down, and let us see what we are working with.”

Teressa did as requested, letting her hair fall. It was thick, and black, and reached her waist. Leliana was telling her about a lady in Orlais, who’s once used live birds to decorate her hair, with dire results. Terrified little birds tend to have loose bowels indeed.

“Well, we’ll just not use live birds I suppose” Teressa giggled.

“If you’ll permit, we should likely cut some of this length…” Leliana pondered. Seeing Teressa’s pained expression she went on “Not short like mine though, just a more manageable length yes?” With a sigh, Teressa agreed.

“Here. this should ease your anguish a bit” Morrigan interjected as she returned to her seat beside them, with a bottle of wine. Teressa took a tentative swallow. “Oh I did not poison it, it is safe, though rather strong. It is a wine we made in the wilds..”

It didn’t taste strong, it was light and pleasant. And it was delicious. Teressa handed Leliana her brush and a small sharpened blade, with instructions to be gentle. Leliana chuckled, and handed her a silver chalice.

“Here, enjoy the wine, and let me work” She laughed.

Morrigan was mixing herbs together in some kind of paste, explaining that with the right combination, they could lighten even the darkest hair. Into her now third serving of the Wilds wine, Teressa simply said “ohhhhh” . She must be crazy, sitting here, letting almost complete strangers cut her hair off and put…stuff in it she thought. But then again, she’d drank darkspawn blood, let a giant, scary, man with purple eyes out of a cage to join them, this was probably the most sane thing she’d done so far.

Suddenly the tugging at her head was done, and Morrigan was pulling small sections up and applying her mixture to them. Teressa was feeling rather…pleasant after her fourth serving of wine, the thought briefly entering her mind that her hair could be green in a few minutes, but that just made her giggle.

“Oh my, you are drunk aren’t you”?” chuckled Leliana.

“Why…I don’t know” replied Teressa, words slurring, proving the point. It was a good thing she’d sent Sten and Alistair off to the woods. She was quite sure Sten would have very much disapproved of a drunk warden. He already disapproved of her being a woman in such a role. She should be a priest, or a shop keeper in his mind.

“And here we are. Finished. Have a look” Morrigan announced, handing Teressa a mirror.

What she saw was almost unrecognizable even to her. Her hair now fell over her shoulders, in gentle waves. Somewhat shorter around the front, and falling slightly over one eye. The mixture Morrigan made added just a couple light blonde streaks on each side. The combination both accented her facial features and changed them. She smiled, and thanked them both.

“Ohh but we are not done yet. Your speech, mannerisms, and…the way you walk, like you sat on my staff, are next” Morrigan chuckled.

“Sat on your…MORRIGAN!” sputtered an indignant Teressa. Laughter from both women ensued while Teressa looked wounded. Well, for about a minute, before she saw the humor herself and joined in.

“And your name. Teressa, while beautiful, is very formal, yes?”  Leliana spoke, as Teressa observed almost ever sentence sound like a question the way she added “yes?” to them. It was endearing.

“err…yes I suppose it is. But what can we…”

“TESSA. We shall call you Tessa from now on.” Leliana interrupted.

Tessa. She tried the name out a few times in her mind, yes it was simple, still similar, Tessa it would be.

“Alright” spoke Morrigan “shall we work on the rest of this dramatic change? Let’s step over here. I think ‘Tessa’ is sufficiently relaxed enough to learn to walk like those of us that don’t have castles and shiny ponies”

“I never had a shiny pony” Tessa uttered petulantly, but followed the women to the clearing behind the tents.

“Watch how Morrigan walks” started Leliana. “Confident, and proud, yet with an air of casualness”

Tess observed and tried to mimic, had anyone been observing this, she’d have died of embarrassment.

“No no..like this” Leliana fell in step behind Morrigan, copying her every move.

Tessa tried and failed again. Morrigan spoke then “think about how you’d approach a lover in the dark”

“A…a… WHAT??” Tess stuttered

“Oh don’t tell me you’ve never…really? I thought you nobles were…more promiscuous” She laughed wickedly.

“Well, some are, in fact most I knew were, but I never…well noble’s sons are so prissy.” Tessa grimaced, inciting laughter from her instructors.

It took what seemed like hours before they were finished. And several more servings of wine, before Morrigan announced that they were done. Just in time too, as the men of the camp had returned. Sten with a deer across his shoulders, and Alistair with several fish, beaming like a small boy.

Leliana walked over to them and congratulated them. Sten only grumbled, as he set off to prepare the deer for dinner. Morrigan grabbed the fish, not trusting Alistair to prepare them properly.  Tessa stayed by the fire, where Alistair joined her.

As she turned to face him, he was dumbstruck. By the Maker she looked so…different. Gone was the pinned up, neatly braided hair that gave her a stern look, replaced with soft waves of the shiniest, softest black tresses he had ever seen. He had to fight the urge to reach out and touch. The touches of blonde, were stunning. And her face, it was softer now. It was all he could do to stop staring.

“Hi! I’m Tessa!…hic” she chirped.

And she’d apparently been drinking.

“Tessa eh? pleasure to meet you, what might I ask happened to Teressa?” He asked, smiling.

“Oh, sad story that. She sat on Morrigan’s staff, and was mortally wounded, we sent her away” She replied.

Giggling came from the other side of the fire, as Leliana couldn’t contain herself any longer. Alistair was perplexed, as he excused himself to wash for supper. It was more to get some distance than hygiene. The urge to run his fingers through her hair, touch her face, was a shock to him.

Tessa wandered over To Leliana as he walked off.

“I think we were successful, yes?” she laughed

“How so?” Tess asked

“Do you not see how he looked at you? He was tempted” She smirked.

“tempted…no, no…he was just surprised, by how different I look. That’s all” Tess stammered. “And besides, the point wasn’t to…tempt anyone. Was it?”

“Beautiful, not just different. And he thinks so too. By the way you’re blushing, I daresay you are pleased. I’ve seen the way you look at him, you know. Anyway, my point is, you can now use a different type of charm in our travels to gather information. Rather than the political savvy you’d used until now yes?”

“I…how? He’s a friend that’s all. We work together”  Tessa replied, seemingly ignoring anything said after the comment on how she looked at him.

“Mmmhmm” Leliana giggled again.

“Look, dinner is ready, shall we eat?” Tessa joyfully said, glad to find a change of topic.

The food was delicious, there was more wine, and Tessa was frustratingly aware as she laid awake in her tent,  that Leliana was right. She did care about Alistair, more than she cared to realize. Ever since she saw him standing there when she awoke at Flemeth’s hut. It’s partly why she’d remained distant those first days on the road. It felt wrong to her, to have feelings for someone she was working with. But a little voice in her head reminded her, this was a dark road. Filled with dangers, and impending death. Making room for happiness might not be a bad thing.

Great she thought to herself. Drinking darkspawn blood, befriending an apostate, rescuing a giant man with purple eyes from a cage to and inviting him to join them after he’d committed murder, was thus far her list of crazy. Now she’s considering tempting a Templar. Crazy was quickly becoming her Modus operandi, she thought as she drifted off to sleep. Then again, he wasn’t really a templar, he never actually took the vows…

.

Alistair watched the fire throw sparks in the air. So much had happened, so much was lost, and now here he was surrounded by people he hardly knew working to fight something he didn’t know enough about. He was angry at himself for all the wallowing he’d been doing in his own self pity for the last several days. He was angry that Morrigan was with them in the first place, and moreso because she couldn’t keep her sodding mouth shut. There was always some snide remark usually aimed at him. He was even angry that everyone else was seemingly moving along, and smiling when he couldn’t.

His fellow Warden, Teressa was asleep. How could she be asleep? There was so much to do, so much to plan, and she was asleep. He had to admit he was even a bit angry at  her. All business since they’d left the wilds, the only time she’d spoken to him had been to discuss who was going to stand watch tonight. Even then she barely looked him in the eye. This after Ostagar when he’d told her he trusted her, even knowing she was a …what was she? Rogue seemed too small a description for her skills. Thief seemed too criminal. Assassin? Spy? It didn’t matter. What mattered was, she is hiding something.

He’d never gotten to ask her how she ended up a Warden. It wasn’t uncommon for Duncan to recruit criminals. The Wardens accepted everyone, blood mages, killers, thieves, traitors. That didn’t bother him, secrecy bothered him. She’d said Duncan had saved her, but…from what?

His brooding was interrupted by a whimper from his right. He glanced over to see Teressa tossing and turning in her sleep. She looked so vulnerable, not like the uptight, semi cold woman he’d seen since the wilds.  The whimpers turned into muffled screams now, and he debated waking her. He knew better of course, you never wake a Warden in the throws of nightmare. Especially ones as lethal with a blade as she is.  His anger started to fade a bit, realizing she hadn’t had it easy since Ostagar either. 

Alistair stared into the fire once again. Not only had she been more badly injured than he, she’d had the task of leading thrown at her due to his own reluctance to do so. She’d listened to him and Morrigan sniping at each other constantly, and her brother was still missing.

More whimpering came, this time it was Shadow, Teressa’s faithful hound standing beside him. The hound cocked his head as he looked between Alistair  and his clearly distressed mistress. He nudged Alistair with his snout as if to prod him to make his human feel better. The dog had been nicer to him since the tower, he seemed to trust him now. If only she did.

He looked over and saw her raise up on an elbow clutching her head. She looked at him then, as shadow ran over to lay beside her. She absently reached for her hound and stroked his head.

“Bad dreams?” Alistair asked.

“It seemed so…real” she replied, still shaking.

“Well, they are real, in a sense. The archedemon ‘talks’ to the horde. We can hear it, the same as they do. That’s how we know it’s a blight. Some wardens learn to block it out, and some even say they can understand it a bit, but I can’t.”  He went on.

“The archdemon…is that the dragon?” she asked him.

“I don’t know if it’s really a dragon, but it sure looks like one. Anyway, I saw you thrashing abut over there and thought I should tell you” He finished quietly.

She looked at him then, not the cold and distant look he’d seen over the last days, but a softer expression in her eyes and she said “Thank You, Alistair. I appreciate that.” to which he replied

“That’s what I’m here for. To deliver bad news, and witty one liners.”

If he wasn’t mistaken, she might have smiled. He was on his feet, and suggesting that since she was up, they get moving again. She just shook her head, as she walked over to him, and asked him to come with her.

She led him away from the rest of their group, to a small pond, and sat on a log, motioning for him to sit with her.  He did as requested, wondering what was going through her mind.

“Do you want to talk about Duncan?” She asked.

He was surprised by that, it came out of nowhere. “You don’t have to do that” he said with his head down, “I know you didn’t know him as long as I did”.

“I want to. He was a friend to me too.” she replied.

With that, he let go. Admitting that he thought he failed Duncan, that if he would have been with him, he could have protected him, or taken the killing blow for him.  He apologized for taking it all so badly. When he finished, he looked up at her. He had to ask “Have you…ever lost someone close to you?” He watched her take a shaky breath, and fight the tears as she nodded.

“It’s time you knew.” She said. “I’ve been hiding something, from everyone since arriving at Ostagar. Only Duncan, and the King knew as far as I could tell. So I’m just going to say it. If my brother is truly dead, you are looking at the Teyrn of Highever.” She told him. Giving it a moment to sink in, she took a sip from a bottle of Wine she had gotten in Lothering. She continued, telling him of Howe’s betrayal, her mother’s sacrifice, Duncan’s rescue.

“ So, you see, I understand completely feeling like you abandoned someone you cared about so deeply. I left my parents in that larder, I escaped. It was their wish that I do so, It was their final gift to me. Just as Duncan sending you to that tower, was his to you. All we can do, is spend the rest of our lives earning it.” She told him, her gaze never leaving his. She added “And if you do go to Highever to give Duncan a proper memorial. I’d like to go with you.”

Alistair let it all sink in, before he said “I’d like that. And I think Duncan would too.”

“I knew you were keeping something back, and like an idiot I assumed it was something dishonest” he continued “and I’m sorry, for everything. My brooding, throwing all the responsibility for leading onto you, even for bickering with Morrigan. But most of all I’m sorry I ever thought I couldn’t trust you. Thank you for talking to me, I know reliving that wasn’t easy”

She smiled and offered him the wine bottle. “To a new day?” she toasted. He smiled back, and added “and new beginnings” as the sun crept up over the horizon. 

“So, my fearless leader” Alistair pondered, “what’s the plan for today?”

“Well, I figured we could rest for a day. I need to take care of some things.”  was the answer.

“That sounds perfect…do we have any cheese?”

Teressa laughed, a sound he realized with a bit of surprise, he wanted to hear more of.

“Who said YOU were getting any rest? Oh no my friend, you and Sten and…my hound, are going out hunting, or fishing, or whatever you manly men do to provide food. Bodahn has a few longbows and arrows for them.” She said with a smile. He looked a bit nervous about the idea.

“But…unless you want mage for dinner, I don’t know how to hunt” He objected.

“That’s ok, Sten can teach, and you can both just follow Shadow’s nose.” she teased as he grumbled. “Oh sure, Sten can teach me in one word sarcastic comments, why not just take Morrigan”

He saw she was holding the bounty poster from Lothering in her hands. The likeness was uncanny.

“What is it?” he asked her.

“This…poster, means Howe may know I’m still alive. If it made it to Lothering, surely they’ve been spread around Denerim by now too, possibly even his lands in Amaranthine. That makes ME a threat to all of you.”

He hated to admit it she was right. They’d already had Loghain’s men try and kill them, plus a band of refugees as well.

“So, while you men are out hunting, I am going to have a little chat with Leliana, and Morrigan. It may be time to…make a few changes.” She said, without elaborating, as she stood up and walked back to the fire. He watched as she threw the offending parchment into the flames. In the quiet, he was sure he heard her say “Goodbye Teressa Cousland”.

“Ahhh here it is, Lothering pretty as a picture” Alistair piped up. I stopped in my tracks at the sound of his voice, having not heard him speak for the days we were on the road. Morrigan, apparently still a touch perturbed that she was packed off with us by her mother took the opportunity to use her favorite weapon. Her mouth.

“Oh he speaks! falling on your sword in grief was too much trouble I take it” she said, and the fight was on.

Great, this is just what I need, these two bickering like little children. My brother was still missing, my feet hurt, I damned well could use a glass of wine, and I was hungry and tired.

“Will you both just SHUT UP! Andraste’s ass! and Morrigan leave Alistair alone.” I spit out in frustration.

“But how can I? he’s standing there…speaking..”

I didn’t let her finish before turning to Alistair, and asking what it was he was going to say. We discussed our options a bit, where to go first…but I was ready to resupply and find somewhere to camp. We could figure it out later.

As we headed into town, I was shocked by the amount of refugees there. They had tents in every open area. There were Chantry sisters fighting with a merchant over his prices, some lunatic shrieking about the end of the world scaring the children.

The first thing I had to do was find Ser Donnel, a templar had been killed by some bandits on the road and had a message in his hand for this person. The same bandits tried to get money out of us under the guise of a toll. They won’t be doing that to anyone else. As we entered the Chantry Alistair suggested we see if any jobs were on the chanter’s board.

“ Alistair, money isn’t going to be a problem for quite a while for us” I informed him. he looked a bit confused at that.

“I’ll explain at camp, too many ears here” I said.

We delivered the message from the templar to Ser Donnel, and received startling news. Arl Eamon, who’s aid we would be needing had fallen mysteriously ill. The knights of Redcliffe had all been sent in search of the urn of sacred ashes, the remains of the prophetess Andraste. They are believed to hold healing powers. Thus far they’d had no luck.  We had informally decided to go to Redcliffe first, but this might change that. More to discuss at camp. And here I was hoping to sleep.

Ser Donnel left, and we decided to go to the Inn, have a hot meal, and by now a drink stiffer than wine.  It was crowded, not a seat to be found. Refugees, drunks, soldiers from wall to wall.  There were three chantry sisters over by the fire, and I thought how odd that was.

As we headed towards the barkeep, three soldiers approached and blocked our way. Loghain’s men. This was not good. Their leader remarked they’d been looking for a woman of my description all morning.  He held up a drawing that even I couldn’t skillfully deny was my likeness. Wanted by the new “King” for crimes committed against the crown at Ostagar.

Crimes? WE were the ones betrayed, along with Duncan and King Cailan! And now we’re being framed for LOGHAIN’S betrayal? This can’t be happening. I froze, I didn’t know what to do, and they were drawing their weapons.

“Gentleman, please, I’m sure there’s a way we can work this out yes?” Came a voice from my left. One of the Chantry sisters I had seen in the corner. As they ran down their list of grievances against me to her, I had time to get my mind in order. They weren’t backing down, and by the maker neither would I.

Morrigan was ready, I could see the slight glow at the ends of her fingers. Alistair had his hands on his shield and sword, and while they looked at this sister, I slid my daggers as I’d been taught, subtly into my hands, blades hidden by my forearms.

“Enough, they want a fight, they’ve got one!” I said as Alistair’s shield slammed the leader to the ground, and Morrigan froze a guard in place. I rolled to the right, and as the leader regained his footing he found himself with the cold steel of my blade at his throat. As I looked around, I realized the other guard was in the same position. I almost laughed right then at the sight before me. This big burly soldier, being held in submission, blade to his throat and a sister of the chantry planted squarely on his back.

That was enough to make him call off his men. Pathetic I thought. Loghain is supposed to be some big hero, and THIS is the best he’s got?

“There, they have surrendered and we can all stop fighting now!” Said the sister cheerfully.

“take a message to Loghain, worm” I snarled, “tell him the gray wardens know what really happened. And we are coming for him”

“Yes ma’am…w-we-we’ll tell him” their fearless leader stuttered as he ran for the door like his pants were on fire.

“So you are gray wardens then? Good! I’m Leliana, lay sister of the chantry here in Lothering. And you are going to fight the blight yes?” She asked.

“Yes, we are, and I’m Teressa, pleased to meet you”

“Good!” she says. “I am coming with you!”

“Wait, what? why?” I asked in bewilderment. Chantry sisters first of all, don’t generally fight like this one just did, and second of all, they generally stick around their chantry, this was no mere sister.

“Because the maker sent me a vision, and wants me to go with you” she chirped.

Well, who was I to argue with the maker? Besides, there were only three of us, and we needed the help.

“Well, if the maker’s on our side, let’s go then” I said.

“Perhaps your skull was cracked worse than mother thought” I heard Morrigan mumble behind me. But she said nothing else. I grabbed a couple bottles of wine from the tavern keep, and we set out to leave Lothering. As we passed through the gates leading out of the town, we came upon a cage with a very large man in it. He looked like he could take out an army all by himself.

I stopped and asked what he was doing in the cage.

“sitting” he replied. That was enlightening.

I asked why he was in the cage.

“I am a prisoner” he said.

This man was great at stating the obvious. I finally got my answer from Leliana, he was imprisoned for killing an entire family.  He was to be left in this cage, trapped like prey. The darkspawn were coming, and he’d die at their hands.

Morrigan was outraged, much to my surprise. I thought her incapable of respect or concern for others. Apparently so did Alistair.

“Sympathy? I didn’t expect that from you” he said.

“I’d also suggest Alistair take his place in the cage” She shot back.

“Yes, THAT I’d expect” he sneered back.

Oh wonderful, more bickering.

His name was Sten, and he is a Qunari. I’d heard about them from Brother Aldous in my studies. Proud warriors, with no equal on the field of battle. He could be helpful. Better to die in battle with us, I thought than in this cage.

“I find myself in need of skilled help, do you think the Revered Mother would release you to assist the Gray Wardens?” I asked.

He shrugged, and said I could try. However, arguing with the Revered mother, in my experiences was never a fun ordeal. And were were leaving this town already. Darkspawn not far behind. We couldn’t save the town, but we could save this man.  Alistair was already heading bck toward the Chantry, i called out to stop him as I deftly picked the cage door lock.

“How did you…” he started to ask.

“well Alistair, when you have a craving for cookies that will not be stopped, and the cook keeps the larder door locked tight…you overcome” I said, and winked, and we headed towards the road.

What a group we were. A Witch, a Templar, a chantry sister, and all being led by a rogue.

As I was chuckling to myself about our little group, a crowd of refugees approached.

“We ‘eard you was a Warden. I don’t know if you killed King Cailan, and I don’t care. But that bounty on your head would feed our families for at least a week…attack!”

And they came at us, the last thing I wanted to do was kill innocents, I’d have given them money to feed their families if they’d given us half a chance, but no. Here they all lay dead and for what? We had to get out of this place. It wasn’t safe. I left a pouch of coins in the hands of their leader, hoping their families found it, and we started moving again.

As we approached the ramp leading to the road, my ears rang. I don’t know how other gray wardens sense darkspawn when they’re awake, but my ears ring.  The more there are the louder the ringing, until I want to plunge my own dagger in there to make it stop. A band of Darkspawn were harassing a merchant and his son.

“Well Leliana, you wanted to fight these monsters, here’s your chance” I said, expecting to see fear or horror. But no, she was raising a longbow, arrow ready (where did she get THAT anyhow?) and I could hear her uttering “Maker preserve us” as she let the arrow loose, hitting the first Genlock right between it’s beady eyes. I laughed as the rest of us lept into the fray and took them all down.

The merchant, a dwarf named Bodahn thanked us for saving him. He was traveling, and asked our destination. I told him he was welcome to come along, if he didn’t mind traveling with Gray Wardens. He decided that was a little to exciting for him and his boy. Understandable really. Considering we can’t seem to walk ten feet without fighting someone or something.

He did provide us with some tents and bedrolls however, a much welcomed relief since we found none in Lothering. And it was time we set up camp. We traveled a while longer, and found a nice spot in the Bannorn.  Morrigan chose a spot far from the rest of us. I wasn’t surprised. Alistair built a fire while Sten, Leliana, and I set up the tents. Shadow was patrolling the edges of camp, when he started barking and growling. I heard voices, and went to investigate.

It was none other than the friendly merchant and his boy, they’d decided our camp might be the safest bet, aside from the very large Mabari of course,  and if the offer still stood, he’d travel with us in exchange for a modest discount. His son, Sandal, was skilled in enchantment, in fact it seemed to be the only word he knew. I assured him, the offer was still good, and headed back to the fire.

I was exhausted. Everyone was settled in for the night. The next day was for planning and rest. Maker knows we’d need it. Shadow was asleep, Alistair was standing watch, and I laid down on my bedroll, and fell fast asleep.  At least for a while…

My mind was flooding with nightmares, jumbled together so badly that I couldn’t tell one from the other. There were monsters in Highever Castle? Mother and Father fighting darkspawn? Ser Gilmore calling me “My Lady” and transforming into an ugly, drooling, hideous ogre? Nothing made any sense, And I couldn’t breathe. Where was Shadow? I tried to open my eyes, but no, I couldn’t. If I could just wake up the dreams would stop.

I felt something being poured down my throat, it didn’t taste awful, nor did it taste good…maybe it had no taste at all, but it was soothing. My mind was still again, but I still couldn’t wake.

“She’ll come around, it’s going to take a day or two. Go stand by the fire, eat something, she’s in good hands.” I heard a woman saying. It was a voice that sounded vaguely familiar, yet not. Then silence again. I drifted back to sleep.

When next I heard noises again, it was male…he was saying something about Morrigan and her mother, about them leaving and telling him to sit with me. He was…was he holding my hand?

“I’m so sorry, I should have protected you better. It should have been me laying here, maker forgive me I’m so sorry, please don’t die on me”

His voice trailed off as sleep, or maybe unconsciousness took me again. Hours passed, maybe days, how would I know, before my eyes finally decided to let me open them. I was in a room, sparsely furnished, just a bed, bookshelves and a witch of  the wilds…wait…what?

I tried to sit up, my head ached, and my body hurt, I had three bandages. One on my shoulder, one on my ribs and one around my stomach. I gingerly touched at one and was shocked when it didn’t send screaming pain through me.

She spoke then. “I see your eyes finally open”

I recognized her then, this was Morrigan, the woman we’d met at the Warden’s cache, who’s mother had given us the documents that Duncan wanted.

“Do you remember mother’s rescue?” she asked.

Rescue? I tried, but all I could remember was being overrun by darkspawn, arrows…darkness.

That was when she told me of the betrayal. The man, Loghain, who was to attack at our signal had quit the field. Abandoning Duncan, the King, all those soldiers, and the rest of the Gray Wardens. They were slaughtered, by a horde that outnumbered them four to one.

“Your friend, he’s not taking it well. He’s alternated between grief and denial since arriving”

Alistair, oh maker. I remembered him telling me how Duncan was like a father to him, the Gray Wardens his brothers. I know the pain he’s feeling, and I know what it can do to a person. I need to get to him.

“Mother asked to see you when you woke, she’s outside. I’ll put something on the stove to eat” Morrigan said. I thanked her for helping me, she seemed taken aback by that and gave all credit to her Mother. I put on my armor, which was freshly cleaned and even repaired, and went outside. Shadow ran happily up to me, wagging his entire body…I was so relieved to see him unharmed I almost cried. It was enough that somehow, maker only knows HOW, Flemeth got us out of that tower. But she took him too?

“See, here comes your gray warden now, you worry too much boy” I heard Flemeth say. That’s when I saw him. Shoulders slumped, staring over the marsh but not really seeing. He turned at Flemeth’s voice, and I could see the pain in his eyes. That same pain that I knew was in mine that night at the castle. The night Duncan saved me. 

“You…you’re alive…” he almost whispered.

I smiled a little, and told him it took more than a few darkspawn to keep me down, but he hung his head and almost choked on his words, telling me than everyone was gone. The wardens, the King, and…Duncan. The man that had been as close to a father as Alistair had had.

Flemeth broke in, whether to distract us from our thoughts or not I don’t know, but she was asking what we’d do now. 

“Alistair is the real warden here, not me” I said, and with that he turned, and for the first time I saw fear in his eyes. “I’ve lost everyone that ever meant anything to me, don’t you back out on me now” He said, voice on the edge of breaking. My heart was on that same edge just hearing it. I placed a hand on his arm and reassured him that I knew exactly how he felt. I wasn’t going anywhere.

“Why would Loghain do this?? Why would he abandon his daughter’s own husband like that? his best friend was King Maric, I don’t understand” He continued.

How to explain all of that to him? I knew the answers, because nobility is rank with backstabbing, power struggles, men who would do anything to have more money and power. Anything at all from arranged marriages to assassination, espionage, sabotage. I’d grown up with it. It’s WHY I was trained the way I was. It’s why my family was attacked by Arl Howe. Conveniently after Father and I repeatedly dashed any hop of an arrangement between Howe’s son and myself.

All I had meant was he had the experience, but in his present state of mind it was doubtless I’d have to step up, and take care of things for now.

“I guess we have to take on this Archdemon” I said.

“What? We don’t even know how, and besides that no warden has ever faced an archdemon without the armies of a half dozen nations!” Alistair yelped.

Flemeth interrupted reminding us that killing the archdemon and raising an army are two different things.

“What about All Eamon Alistair? Didn’t you mention he’d help?

He looked a little hopeful then, recalling that the Arl’s armies weren’t at Ostagar, he still had all his men.

“Well we DO have treaties here for…” I quickly read through them  “at least three…Dwarves, elves, and the circle of magi” I pointed out.

Suddenly he looked hopeful, Flemeth was smiling and said

“I may be old, but dwarves, elves, mages…THAT sounds like an army”

“Can we do this? Deliver these treaties and gather our allies”

“Why not?” I said, “Isn’t that what us Gray Wardens do?”

For the first time he almost smiled. We thanked Flemeth for all she’d done, and prepared to head out,  but she stopped us.

“Before you go, there’s one more thing I can offer you.” she said, as Morrigan came out of the hut.

“Well mother? shall we have two guests for the eve? Or…none” I was fairly sure she was hoping the answer would be none.

“I’m sending Morrigan with you” said Flemeth.

Alistair’s jaw dropped, and Morrigan looked like a toad just jumped down her shirt. But her magic would be useful, she did know the wilds better than us. And without much choice in the matter she  gathered her things, not neglecting the chance to throw some snippy comments at her mother.

“Fine” said Morrigan “I suggest a town just north called Lothering, where you can get supplies and rest before moving on, or if you prefer I can just be your silent guide”

Considering I had no idea yet what I was doing or where I was going, I told her to speak her mind. Instruction Flemeth laughingly told me I’d live to regret.

We walked the entire night, mostly in silence. Morrigan stayed far ahead, Alistair trudge along behind her. I stayed to the rear. It was a better vantage point for me should anyone…or anything attack us. As the sun started rising, we found ourselves at our destination.

Lothering…

“Alistair, you and Teressa are to go to the Tower of Ishal and light the beacon to alert Loghain’s men to attack. This is by the King’s order.” Duncan instructed.

“Just so you know, if King Cailan asked me to wear a dress and dance for him, I am putting my foot down!”  An almost pouting Alistair stated.

“I might like to see that” came out of my lips before I could stop it.

“For you? Maybe. But it had better be a pretty dress.” he replied, Duncan could only groan.

“Are you both clear on what you are to do now?” He asked, and we replied we were.

“Then maker watch over us all”.

Duncan then headed for the front lines, and Alistair and I headed for the bridge. We could see the armies ready to charge, mabari hounds pulling against their masters’ hold hungry for the fight. I looked down at Shadow, grateful he would be with me and not with the rest. People had told my parents it was cruel to have a mabari hound as a mere pet, but he was indeed a war hound. While most noble daughters had a bodyguard, I had Shadow.

We stood in awe as the Darkspawn army came out of the trees, both transfixed by the sheer volume of creatures emerging, when the first boulder struck the side of the fortress we snapped out of our haze and ran across the bridge to the tower.

Two soldiers came running down the ramp “The tower has been taken by Darkspawn!” This was a bad sign, there was to be no fighting here…they must have broken off from the main force. We joined the two and headed in, fighting was everywhere, guards trying to hold off these infiltrators. If they got past us, they’d have access to the entire fortress.  I looked at Alistair, and he was waiting for direction, so I sent him after the spellcaster, his templar training was perfect for that. I sent shadow after the archers, and I took to the shadows and took out the heavier armored creatures. I do so enjoy how little armor protects from a swift stab to the back of the neck.

When the yard was cleared we paused to catch our breath and headed inside the tower doors. Everything was quiet. As I suck around a pillar I saw it, a trap, set to spill oil out on the floor, likely to be lit afire with an arrow or spell. I sensed them nearby as I cut the trip wire. Not so bright using such a simple device to lay their ambush. I motioned for the group to hold while I crept forward to see how many where there. No less than 10, and there were four of us, and a dog.

“Alistair..can you take 3 at once with the shield?” I asked

“As you wish, I can take four if neccessary but best not to push it” He replied.

I looked to the mage and soldier we’d picked up, the mage would freeze one, Shadow could take a couple with my help, and the remaining soldier could surely handle two.

It was a genius plan if I say so myself, Alistair held his three easily, I helped the mage dispatch his frozen target, then instructed him to start casting at Alistair’s group. Shadow had one of his two snacks down already, and I quickly slashed through the second on my way to assist the soldier, before turning to Alistair and seeing everything was dead.

“We DO work well together” he said with a grin, I smiled back, and the rest of the tower went much the same way. When we paused for a breath at the stairs to the third floor, we were exhausted.

“Where did all these darkspawn come from? the tower was supposed to be secure.” asked Alistair.

I couldn’t help replying back with “Well, you wanted to fight, you should be happy” He arched an eyebrow and conceded my point as we pushed on.

One more floor to clear, and as tired as we were it was a relief to come upon the dogs still in their cages. While Alistair charged in, I sprinted for the release lever and let loose the dogs. They tore into the monsters like it was their last meal. We left them to handle the floor and headed to the roof to light the signal.

As we opened the door we all stopped in our tracks, standing before us, munching on what was once…human, was a gigantic, battle scared, drooling, ogre. It was as shocked to see us as we were to see it. Chaos ensued as it charged at us. Alistair, shockingly quick on his feet dodge the charge and drew it’s attention toward him, facing the opposite direction. I knew better than to get close to that monstrosity in my flimsy leather armor and switched to a longbow I’d taken from one of the corpses. I instructed our soldier friend to do the same.

I have never felt such fear, not even during the invasion at our castle…this thing was throwing Alistair and Shadow around like they were his toys.  Alistair was knocked flat on his back and the beast had turned, lunging for Shadow…before I thought about it, I launched myself from my position, dropping the longbow and grabbing a dagger in each hand.

I was not going to see my dog, my most loyal friend killed in front of me. Blind rage drove me forward, as everything that had happened flashed through my mind. Suddenly the Ogre to me, took on the appearance of that bastard Howe and I lept onto one of it’s massive thighs, using it as leverage to get to where I guessed it’s heart was.  As I reached my target, I plunged both daggers into it’s chest and twisted until it crashed to the ground. Not satisfied it was dead, I made one final blow to the jugular leaving no doubt as I shouted for Alistair to light the beacon.

It was done, we made it. As we took a moment to apply poultices to our wounds, and head to the battle going on in the field we sensed them.  We stood up quickly and turned around but not fast enough. A swarm of darkspawn entered, led by some kind of sorcerer. First went the mage, then the soldier who’d accompanied us, before I could figure out what to do the first arrow pierced my armor, piercing my left side from front to back, as the pain registered, the second found it’s mark, going through my left shoulder. When the third pierced my stomach everything went black,. The last thing I heard was Shadow, ferocious and brave, fighting the monsters. Fighting for me.

We arrived at the temple before Duncan. While we waited, Alistair stood quietly, and I stood absorbed in my own thoughts. How I got here, what I was doing, would I even survive this ritual? Jory’s voice broke my thoughts. The man was starting to panic again. I guess when Alistair said Duncan does the best he can with what he has he was right. Daveth was strangely confident, as Jory moaned about his wife and child he actually made a good point.

“Ser Jory, you saw those monsters, would you not sacrifice anything, including your life to safe your pretty wife and child from them?”

Jory only mumbled he’d never  encountered a foe he couldn’t face with his blade. I swore I was the bravest of the three of us, and I’m a woman. But Daveth was doing alright, and I was being petty. I mumbled something, I don’t remember what, but the gist of it was let’s just get this over with. We all went into our own minds then, and everything was still.

Duncan arrived, carrying a chalice with some form of liquid in it, and placed it on the table beside him, then he turned and spoke.

“The Gray Wardens were founded during the first Blight, when humanity stood on the brink of annihilation – and so it was that the first Gray Wardens drank of Darkspawn blood and mastered their taint.”

Again the complaints rose up “we’re going to drink the blood of those…THINGS??” Duncan ignored them for the most part and continued on.

“This is the source of our power and of our victory.”

Alistair spoke up, and explained that those who survive this ritual become immune to the taint. I only heard “those who survive” before my mind started reeling, and I repeated it in shock. My parents had forced me to leave them, only asking that I survive, what if now I didn’t? Who would find Fergus? The ritual continued while my mind turned these questions over and over like a barrel rolling downhill.

Duncan asked Alistair to speak the words spoken at joinings for centuries. Something in the tone settled my nerves, I’m not sure if it was the words or the way he spoke them but I regained my calm. I realized even if I don’t make it, Fergus will get the news, and maybe it would be better from a stranger.

“Join us, Brothers and Sister. Join us in the Shadows where we stand vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that can not be forsworn, and should you perish, know that you’re sacrifice shall not be forgotten and that one day… We shall join you.”

Daveth was first, and he overdid it. He took the chalice and drank from it as if he were drinking a pint at the local tavern, I saw Duncan’s eyes briefly flash an expression of horror as he grabbed the Chalice back. Daveth fell to his knees, screaming in agony, clutching his head…his eyes briefly flashed white…just before he died at my feet.

He called Jory forward next, and I could see him starting to fight. He was filled with fear at what we had just  witnessed. Truth be told, so was I, but unlike Jory, I had nothing left to lose. Duncan tried to calm Jory, but his eyes were wide, his sword was drawn and he was saying “There’s no glory in this!”. I had a hand on my dagger and readied myself to spring at him, he would not kill this man who had saved me.

Alistair grabbed my wrist before I could move, and in the brief moment I looked at  him, he shook his head, when I looked back, Jory was falling, and Duncan was sheathing a dagger of his own, and saying he was sorry. It was my turn.

I took the chalice, and before I could lose what little nerve I had mustered, drank from it. It burned as it slid down my throat, as if I’d swallowed a swarm of stinging insects. I couldn’t breathe, my chest hurt, my head was screaming….then darkness.

I was back in Highever. Father had called a meeting. Duncan was there. Howe was there. I couldn’t hear the conversation, but I was leaving the room. I was going to the larder, Shadow had gotten into the larder again, and Nan was upset. I opened the door….but it wasn’t Nan. It was hideous, monstrous, it was…a dragon? It’s roar hurt my head, searing into my ears, it was looking at me…looking  INSIDE me, invading my mind…it hurts, oh maker it hurts

Wait, I hear voices…I know them,they’re saying my name…I need to open my eyes..and what is that growling?

I opened my eyes to an almost amusing sight. I say almost, because my head hurt immediately when I tried to chuckle. Shadow had somehow found his way here, and was laying on top of me, snarling and snapping at a very perplexed Alistair.

“I don’t understand this mutt of yours Teressa, first he bathes me in dog drool, and now, when all I want is to make sure you have a pulse he tries to EAT ME!”

I called off the hound, and both men helped me to my feet., congratulating me and welcoming me to the ranks. I had survived. It was over.

Duncan instructed me to take some time, and then meet him at a meeting with King Cailan. He left then, leaving me alone with Alistair once again. He looked rather sad, and tired, and explained at his joining only one person had died, but it was awful. He didn’t offer details, and I didn’t ask. I could imagine.

“you were ready to pull your blade back there, I thought you trusted Duncan?” He asked suddenly, almost angrily.

“I do, he saved me from Howe’s men by bringing me here. It was not him you stopped me from attacking Alistair. It was Jory. I could not lose anyone else…I just…couldn’t” I told him.  I was on the verge of tears, but I’m not sure if it was from the thought of losing anyone else, or the fact  that Alistair had instantly jumped the the wrong conclusion.

He was visibly relieved, but I knew then he had more problems with what I am than he was willing to admit.  I understood that, but it would have to be addressed if we were to work together after this. It’s not an easy thing to have faith in someone who’s skills are in spying, sabotage, and stealth, not to mention the art of dagger play. It could wait to be dealt with. After all, how much would we really work together after this battle. The king was sure this would be a first and final battle against these creatures.  Maybe I could just keep my distance.

I excused myself to join Duncan, but he held me back.

“Before you go, I wanted to give you this. It’s an amulet, containing a bit of the blood from your ritual. To remember.”

It was beautiful, A silver chain held it, and in the round center of the amulet, the blood seemed to have a life of it’s own. How could something so dark mix with such beauty? With Alistair’s help, I immediately put it on, thanked him, and continued on to the meeting.

It was done. I was now a fully Gray Warden

After Duncan had given me the directions to the scrolls we needed, our little band headed out into the Korcari wilds. It was my first time in a setting that didn’t have lots of stone buildings and roads to walk upon. Vastly unfamiliar, but beautiful to look at.  My admiration was interrupted by a sound in the distance, a low howl.

I had Jory, Alistair and Daveth hold their positions, telling them to stand ready and wait for my command. Noone seemed to mind that suddenly I was taking over, and I crept ahead, my boots making barely a sound to see what was around the bend. Wolves. And hungry looking ones at that, coming our direction. I called everyone forward and had the rush the pack, taking them by surprise. Noone was injured, and we all had some pelts for trade if needed.

“Well” said Alistair “that settles it, you’re in charge. Lead on!” He seemed relieved, I thought, and I was at ease with taking charge. We headed further into the swamps, and came across a badly injured soldier, still alive but barely. I kneeled down to hear him better, as he explained his patrol was attacked by a group of Darkspawn, he was the only survivor.  I still had hope of finding my brother out here, so I asked

“Have you seen Fergus Cousland?” I asked, but unfortunately he had not. Alistair bandaged the wounded man, and he stumbled back towards Ostagar.

Suddenly, Jory started to panic. Startled by how badly injured the soldier was, and hearing they had been overrun by the darkspawn, he was filled with doubt that the four of us could survive our mission should we meet them. Daveth was the first to try and calm him, albeit unsuccessfully. I tried as well telling him we were hardly unequipped to handle this, he argued however that soldiers were well equipped. I have all the respect in the world for Fereldan’s soldiers, however as a knight, Jory should know there’s a difference between well enough trained, and specially trained. There was no soothing I could do that would calm the man.

Alistair spoke then, explaining that as a warden, he could sense nearby darkspawn, thus giving us an advantage. A warning, so we can prepare assaults. He also explained we weren’t going to run into the vast horde, likely just stragglers. His voice was soothing, even to my ears, and Jory relaxed slightly. At least until Daveth piped up with “You see Ser Jory, we might die, but we’ll know about it first”.

I must have tensed visibly with the sudden flash of anger I felt, which would hardly be surprising considering I was still working on controlling my temper.  For Alistair, put a hand on my shoulder and set Daveth straight.

“And here you said you were no good with being diplomatic” I said as Jory and Daveth moved ahead of us.

And he replied “Yes well, don’t let it get around”  I assured him his secret was safe, and to myself admitted I might not want to strangle him as much as I thought.

We encountered some darkspawn here and there, small bands mostly, and easily dispatched with some quick planning. Alistair’s ability to warn us and my own ability to sneak around behind them made the task almost too easy. We collected the blood we needed, and were heading towards the ruins for the scrolls when I saw this beautiful flower growing along the swamp. I stopped to look at it and Daveth informed me the kennel master had been asking for them. Apparently they helped the Mabari hounds that had swallowed darkspawn blood in battle. The blood is toxic. I thought of Shadow, and how I would feel had he been in such a state, and picked the flower. Daveth mentioned there was a reward, but that didn’t interest me. Knowing what I did of the breed, how special and loyal they are, this was something I would do for nothing but the satisfaction of knowing I had helped.

Suddenly Alistair yelled “Darkspawn!” and we were fighting again. By the time we carved our way through them, we were at the ruins we searched for. And here was the chest, but it had no treaties in it. It lie broken and empty, like everything else. But I heard something…or more accurately felt.

I looked up in time to see a woman slinking towards us. Dressed rather scantily, with hair as black as my own, and eyes of amber, almost slanted like a cat as she spoke to us. She questioned our presence in “her wilds”, and before I could question any further Daveth was shrieking about her being a “Witch of the Wilds”. I forced my eyes not to roll, as she asked our purpose there.

Before I could answer, Alistair warned me not to, as she looked Chasind, and could be dangerous. Maker’s breath the urge to choke him was returning. Before I could tell him that, she spoke, mocking him about fear of being swooped down upon, to which he brilliantly replied “Yes, swooping is…bad”. I whispered over my shoulder “is that the best you could come up with?” and I am sure he wanted to stick his tongue out at me like a child, but he managed to stop talking.

“You there, women do not scare like little boys…why are you here”

I explained we were looking for the documents, and she knew of what I spoke, telling me they were no longer here. She also introduced herself as Morrigan, and commended my manners. This was going well. Until Alistair, clearly bursting at the seams jutted in with “You stole them! You’re some…sneaky witch thief!”  Before I could do anything but throw him an icy glare she rebutted.

“How Eloquent!” she laughed. Exactly what I was going to say actually. She was sarcastic, and sly, intelligent, and well spoken. I found myself liking her immediately. I got no sense of danger from her at all. When she informed us her mother had actually taken the papers, I suggested she take us to her. She agreed. And said “you know, I like you”Alistair shook his head muttering something about “First it’s I like you, then bam…frog time”, Daveth was shrieking about being thrown in a pot, and Jory was the voice of reason this time.

“If the pot is warmer than this forest, I say we go”  I threw another icy glance at Alistair, and Daveth and agreed, that yes, we should go.

We arrived at a hut not long after and met Flemeth. She was a strange old woman, made very little sense, but admitted to having the documents. She laughed heartily at the men and their mutterings about witches and frogs, and shut Alistair’s mouth quickly when she pointed out the seals had worn off but she had protected these papers for years. He was prepared to complain about the theft until then, and he finally did something mature and thanked her.

She wished us well, and we headed back to camp, Morrigan leading us around any further Darkspawn. We arrived safely, and she vanished into the wilds. I was anxious to see my hound so I headed to the fire where I’d last left him, and crouched down to scratch his belly.  Alistair came up behind me, and reached to hand me the flower I’d dropped when Shadow almost took his hand off.

I almost laughed when he jumped backwards and almost tripped over my shield laying behind him.  Until I saw the look on his face, and felt badly. I took his hand to check for damage, and it was ok. So I apologized for my hound, and explained his tendency to be over protective. He was protective enough before the betrayal of Arl Howe, now however he was a terror to all who approached me in a way he found threatening. At times, all that took was a look.

“Here let me talk to him” I said

“Talk to him? I know Mabari are supposed to be smart, but really? TALK to him?”

“Just watch, you’ll see” I said. And he stood there, one eyebrow arched as if to say “this I have to see”.

I called Shadow over, and knelt in front of him.

“Now Shadow, this is Alistair. I am going to be working with him for a while it seems, so you need to be NICE to him. Understand?”

Shadow responded with a joyous bark, and immediately pranced over to Alistair, knocked him on his back and licked his face exuberantly.

As Alistair lay on the ground, dazed, confused, and now slightly damp, I asked if he doubted my hound’s intelligence any further.

“No, dear Maker no, just…get him OFF!”

Duncan walked up just then, a slight smirk on his face, and I commanded the hound to heel.

“Well you two, if your quite done turning Alistair into a chew toy…we have a joining to attend to”

I stifled a chuckle, and followed Alistair to the temple, as he desperately wiped the drool off.

“Teressa, could I speak to you for a moment” Duncan asked, as our group was turning to leave. I let the others go ahead and turned back to see what he wanted of me.

“I see you’re carrying your sword and shield, however Alistair is very skilled in that department, why don’t you take a moment and equip yourself properly?” he said.

I was stunned. I knew he knew about the years of training that had taken place in the background of my regular studies. And I knew eventually I’d have to use them. But…having met Alistair, I wasn’t sure he could trust me if he knew. He seemed very strong in his judgment of “good” or Bad”, and I was a gray area so to speak.

It began when I was younger, too slight in build to wield a full sized weapon in fact. Fergus and I were having our studies with Aldous in the library. We were learning of some great battle that had taken place centuries ago. Fergus, as was usual was enthralled by the weaponry, and fighting styles that went with them. I however, was fascinated with the strategy. In fact, our task that morning was to detail our own strategy for battle. We were each provided with a map and tools to mark armies, and movements. Fergus, bold and brave led a full frontal assault against the enemies front lines, and laughed at my taking so much longer than him.

I waved him off and continued my work. Plotting flanking maneuvers, finding weaknesses, and sabotage of course. I even went so far as to pilfer the enemy camps the night before to weaken them further.

We were both congratulated on our good work and released for the afternoon. Fergus went off to  do whatever it is little boys do, I took to my favorite past time. Sneaking around the castle, into places that I shouldn’t be. My first stop was always the larder. Nan would be busy, making it easy for me to sneak in, unlock the door, and pilfer some sweets. This tactic never failed, I’d satisfy my sweet tooth, Nan would blame the rats or my dog, and noone was ever the wiser. Or so I thought.

On this day, as I made my escape, sugary treat in hand, my father was waiting at my exit. He cocked an eyebrow at me and led me to his study.

“Pup, I have heard reports of missing sweets, and various shiny baubles from around the castle. Would you know anything about that?”

I let my eyes grow wide and innocent, and denied any possible knowledge of such heinous crimes. This had always worked in the past. Having been granted rather large eyes, with thick lashes, and a color that combined Father’s brilliant blue, and Mother’s exquisite green, into a shocking  aquamarine. I learned at an early age my eyes were quite a weapon, capable of inflicting guilt, and as I grew older, causing young boys to forget what they were saying if I fluttered my lashes just right. They had always worked on Father, until now.

“Don’t play the innocent with me child, I know what you’ve been up to. You may not realize, but I have eyes in the back of my head, and you’re about to meet them. Your teacher has shown me your work from today, which is why I was looking for you. I’d like to introduce you to Lasanna.”

A small elven woman stepped forward from the darkened corner. She’d been there all along, and I hadn’t known it. That immediately earned my respect, as I was usually overly aware of everything around me.  I had seen her around the castle, but she looked different today. The other times, she had been in servant clothing, working in Nan’s kitchen, or in the dining hall. But today, she was dressed in fine leathers, with the most terrifying daggers I had ever seen, strapped to her back.

“Pleased to meet you” I stammered. Father spoke again saying

“Lasanna is one of my special guards. You knew they existed yes pup? “ I nodded as he continued.

“When Fergus and I are called away, they of course travel with me. However, I’d like at least one to remain here with your mother when I’m away. That is why…starting today, YOU will be trained in their arts.”

“But father!” I protested “I want to be trained as a warrior, like Fergus!”

He chuckled and said “You will be Pup, when you’re strong enough to handle a sword and shield. This training however can be learned now.”

Father left the room, allowing Lasanna and I to speak. The first thing I wanted to know, was who this woman was. Being bold, I asked of her history. She came from Antiva. I knew that much from the accent. She was hesitant, but finally she spoke.

“If you must know, I was sent here by an organization I will not name. I was sent on a mission, to kill your father. I did not want to do it, I had no choice. When I set up the ambush, I made many mistakes, and was captured by his guards. Your father is a very kind man, and rather than have me arrested or executed, hired me himself, as well as the others that were working with me, as his silent guard. That is all I will tell you. Now let’s get to work.”

She led me to the deepest part of the castle’s dungeons. To a room behind a wall I didn’t know existed. It was full of shining daggers, stuffed targets, bows and sacks of pointed arrows.   None of which I was allowed to touch.

“First things first My Lady. You have already mastered the art of stealth and disabling locks, so you by your nature have saved me alot of work. However, your manners…they are atrocious. You may be sassy and obnoxious around the castle, however in society…you must, I cannot emphasize enough, MUST be, shall we say, diplomatic. You must at all times keep your temper in check. Smile politely, be amiable, be polite. These things are what grants you the gift of persuasion. And with your looks, you could with the right manners, steal a man blind while stabbing him in the back leaving a smiling corpse.”

I wouldn’t have to work too hard on this I  knew. I have been raised a noble, and my lack of manners was more by choice than nature. My temper however…I would need to control better.

In the years that followed, I learned how to avoid blows, incapacitate an opponent in order to get behind them for lethal strikes, where to kick to weaken them from the front (very unladylike I might add), and most importantly and hardest to grasp…anticipation. I had always been able to tell someone was sneaking up behind me, what I didn’t know was how to counter it. I was taught a quick move of shoulder and hip that would plant an enemy at my feet, completely winded however, and I learned it quickly. Much to Fergus’ disappointment the next time he tried to sneak up and pull my hair.

By the time I’d reached the age of 16, two years after it’s start, my training came to an end. Lasanna entered my room to speak with me. We’d long since become friends…maybe not sister like, she always remained aloof to a point but she was friendly enough and the closest I had to a female friend.

“You, My Lady have become one of the best I have ever seen. I have enjoyed teaching you, but now you have learned all I have to offer. It is time now for you learn other weapons, become proficient enough to hide these things you have learned. Until the time is right. “

It was then she handed me a gift. I removed the sheepskin cover to find the  softest, most beautiful leather boots, gloves, and armor I had ever seen. I hugged her in thanks, and she spoke again.

“that is not all” she pulled two daggers from her pack.

“These are gifts from your parents. They are of excellent make, and unlike any other. Use them well.”

The daggers were exquisite. Blades curved like a woman almost. A very lethal woman. Lighter than anything I had ever felt in my hands. One rose colored with my birth gem embedded in the shaft from my Mother, the other silverite with another birth gem embedded in it’s shaft as well, from my father. Each engraved with a message.

“Daughter, Every rose must have it’s thorn. This is yours -Mother”

And the other dagger simply said

“Pup, you’re the pride of my heart. All My Love- Father”

I quickly put on the armor, slid one dagger in each boot, and  went to thank my Parents. Upon entering the room the smiled and congratulated me. I replied the gifts were thanks enough, but they were congratulating me for something else. It seemed Lasanna had informed them I was ready for a new task. I was the “Silent Guard” that would be in charge at the castle in Father’s absences. Strategically it was genius, the spoiled daughter, noone would suspect capable of anything more strenuous than lacing her boots. I was honored beyond words and swore to do my best.

I had grown a bit by now, stronger physically and mentally. Enough to continue on to learn to use the shield and sword as best I could, enough to appear as if I knew what I was doing. My passion to learn had waned since being taught by Lasanna, but I learned well enough to get by.  Until now.

I voiced my concern about this to Duncan, that I feared Alistair wouldn’t trust me, unsure myself why this mattered so much, after all he was a relative stranger to me. But most people when they know a rogue is at their back don’t take it as a good thing.  Duncan just chuckled at me, and said

“Do you really think he doesn’t know? And if he didn’t know you weren’t what you claim to be he’d figure it out quickly enough the first time you tried using that shield and accidently knocked Jory or Daveth unconscious.”

I was still unsure so I jested “well, considering Daveth…would that be so bad? I think the women in camp might actually cheer me for it”

Alistair then appeared, clearly impatient to get going, and handed me my daggers, and with an arched eyebrow said

“I believe these belong to you?”

I turned, surprise must have been clear on my face, and he excused us from a smiling Duncan to speak with me. I wasn’t sure whether to berate him for getting into my pack and disturbing and possible seeing my unmentionables, or just kick him right in the shins. Deciding I’d hurt my toes badly using that second notion, I just glared while he spoke.

“Yes, I know about it. No it doesn’t bother me. Duncan would not have went all that way to bring back someone HE didn’t trust with our lives, and since I trust him with mine…I trust you with these. He also told me you were an excellent strategist, a confident leader, and at ease with politics and diplomacy. All things I am not. What I AM is good at hitting things, and getting hit, and following directions.  To that end, I think we’ll work well together. Though he could have warned me you were…well that you were, um…a woman and a pretty one at that”

And with that he blushed and went back to Daveth and Jory. Duncan again approached.

“Do you feel better about this now? You’re grinning, so you must. What exactly did you say to Alistair? I haven’t seen him blush that badly since we caught him raiding the larder at the compound. Or is that WHY you are grinning?”

To tell the truth, I wasn’t sure. But I felt better, and I left my shield with Shadow at Duncan’s tent and quickly changed into the equipment that I’d been longing for since Arriving. I still wanted to kill Alistair for being in my pack in the first place but I was too amused by the fact that his ears were still red to stay angry.